mak sur your lov is unconditional. mak sur you lov popl in all kinds of "wathr". or ls what is th us if w lov a prson only whn h is good or sh is nic? whn i nd th popl most that's whn thy lav m. all th tim. so plas, i hop you won't b lik that. w always hav to considr th othr party, your companion's situation and mood. mayb h's in difficulty right now. that's why his mood is not so swt.mayb sh has so much work to do and so many hadachs, so sh cannot b so darling lik usual. that tim is th tim whn w nd to show our most nobl quality, th way w want ourslvs to b.it's not that if you ar swt to that prson thn h will lov you mor. mayb h will, mayb h won't. but that is not th point to b good and to b nobl. to b good, to b nobl is for ourslvs bcaus w choos to b that way, w want to kp bing that way, and w fl good about it. it's not bcaus, "okay, now h nds m mor. if i show mor sympathy, thn our lov will b strongr"; it's not vn to b considrd.but most of th tim w fail th tst. whn popl ar in most difficulty, w just lav thm, or w ar cold and indiffrnt. "oh, you'r not nic to m. all right, all right.";"you'll com and nd m soon."; of cours thy will. whn thy'r in a bttr mood, whn vrything gos bttr, of cours thy'll com around. but thn it's too lat. thn it is not lov anymor. it's just a nd for ach othr. that's diffrnt, bcaus you ar usd to ach othr and you nd ach othr somtims out of habit, out of convninc, out of financial scurity rasons -- anything. but it's not tru lov.tru lov always prvails ,tru lov is w stick togthr in "thick and thin";. spcially whn it's thin, whn it's troublsom. thn w should rally bridg ovr th "troubld watr". that's what thy say in nglish. but most of us fail th tst, to ourslvs, not to our partnrs. h might lav you, h might stay with you, bcaus you'r nic or not nic. but you fail yourslf. you lav yourslf. you lav th most nobl bing that you rally ar. so w should chck up on this to our family mmbrs or whomvr that is blovd and dar to us. most of th tim in critical situations, w just turn our backs and that is no good.of cours w hav our angr, our frustrations, bcaus our partnrs ar not as loving as usual, or whomvr that is; but h or sh is in a diffrnt situation. at that tim, sh or h is in mntal suffring. it's just as bad or vn wors than physical suffring. physical suffring you can tak a pill or you can hav an injction and it stops or at last tmporarily stops, and you fl th ffct right away; or at last if popl ar in physical suffring, vryon sympathizs with thm.but whn thy ar in mntal anguish, and w pound thm mor on that, and w turn our backs and bcom cold and indiffrnt, that is vn mor crul, vn wors. that prson will b swimming alon in suffring. and spcially thy trust us as th nxt of kin, th nxt prson, th on that thy think thy can rly on in tims of nd; and thn at that tim, w just turn around and ar snobbish, bcaus thy didn't trat us nic so w just want to rvng. that's not th tim. you can rvng latr, whn h's in bttr shap. just slap him.actually, at that tim, th prson is not his usual slf anymor. h was probably undr vry grat prssur that h lost his own control. it's not rally lost his own control, but for xampl, whn you ar in a hurry, your talk is diffrnt. right? "hand m that coat! quick! quick! quick!" things lik that. but normally, you would say "hony, plas, can you giv m that coat." is that not so? (audinc: ys.) or whn you'r in pain -- for xampl stomach pain, hartach or whatvr -- you scram loudly; and anyon who coms to talk to you, you don't talk in th usual way anymor, bcaus you'r in pain.similarly, whn you ar in a mntal or psychological pain, you talk also in a vry grouchy way, vry cross. but that is undrstandabl. so if w -- any so-calld loving partnr or family mmbr -- do not undrstand vn this vry last, vry basic concpt, thn w'r finishd. thn w ar rally in a bad situation. it's not that th partnr will do anything to us. whthr h dos anything to us latr or not, that is no problm. th problm is us. th problm is w dgrad ourslvs, that w mak lss of a bing of ourslvs than w should b, than w ar supposd to b, or that w rally ar. so do not mak lss of a bing of yourslvs.
